Nita

Well I've been raised in the church my whole life (I'm 19 now). My dad is a Pastor and my mom is an Evangelist. My parents always raised me with good morals, values, and the seed of God's Word ever since I was young. I always believed in God, however I didn't know Him for myself or have a relationship with Him. I just depended on my parent's relationship with Him to cover me basically. Well, when I was in HS I really lost myself. At the age of 14 I started sneaking out and having sex with this older boy even though I was taught to wait until marriage. I had a completely wrong idea of love. I wasn't emotionally and mentally mature enough to engage in sex at that age. I was taken advantage of and created soul ties for myself. Because of this relationship I started struggling with insecurity, low self esteem, and depression. After that the cycle continued on and on and I had many unhealthy relationships. I often cried at night and I was always sad. It was like I was living in my own emotional and mental hell. Further down the road in high school my parents started their own church. I became a worship leader all of a sudden but like I said I had no relationship with God at all really. I didn't even know what I was singing about or what it meant. I was also trying to be just like everyone else and be in the world. I started going to parties, drinking alcohol, lying to my parents, and was still having sex and in lustful unhealthy relationships. I didn't want to walk in the purpose and anointing God had on my life. Well one day at church I was singing and something just came over me. I can't even describe it. It was like I felt God pouring His love out and His Holy Spirit out on me & I just started weeping. At that moment it was like something just shifted within me and I was never the same from the moment on. I didn't have a desire to do the things I used to do and I realized that my worth was not in this world, but in Jesus Christ.